The Reckoning Read online

  Olivia nodded.

  “He sure did. How was the drive?”

  “It was fine.”

  “I thought you were going to Mandeville, for the Solstice?”

  Celes looked surprised that Olivia had remembered.

  “We are. I’ll be leaving from here and driving up there myself, so I’m not staying long.”

  “Too bad. Barbecued ribs for dinner tonight.” Olivia shot him a friendly grin, and Celes smiled back at her.

  Tristan looked between them, getting the strangest, vaguest feeling. She told herself to remember this interaction -- it seemed inconsequential now, but also seemed like it might be relevant later.

  Celes stayed a while longer, and Tristan relaxed once her hormones had a chance to settle down. She’d forgotten that for the most part she could enjoy Celes’s company, and for not the first time she felt an enormous sense of guilt over what he had no idea was coming. He left without attempting to touch her in any way, and Tristan was relieved, closing the door behind him and leaning on it.

  “Worlds collide,” Olivia commented, walking by and shaking her head, on her way to the kitchen.

  “Hey,” Tristan said, and Olivia turned. “Have you talked to Tyler?”

  Olivia bit her lip, looking down at her phone, which she clutched in her hand.

  “Not yet. I’ve been typing and deleting all day without sending.”

  Tristan nodded.

  “It’ll be OK, O. He’s not going to give up on you that easily.”

  Olivia nodded, looking apprehensive.

  “Maybe I’ll just text him and ask him to come over so we can talk in person.”

  “That’s probably the best idea.”

  Taking a deep breath, Olivia switched on her phone, her fingers tapping the touchscreen in quick succession.

  “There. Will you wait with me until he responds?”

  Tristan nodded and followed Olivia into the kitchen. Olivia set her phone on the island and began pulling food out of the fridge, assembling a sandwich. She was in the middle of telling Tristan about her latest makeup tutorial Instagram post, trying to convince her to make her own account so Olivia would gain another follower, when her phone vibrated. Olivia and Tristan exchanged a look.

  “Can you read it? I can’t.” Olivia looked panicky, and Tristan nodded, reaching for the phone.

  She smiled. “I was hoping you’d ask me this. Tell me when to come over.”

  “You’re lying,” Olivia said, her hands creeping up towards her mouth as she got teary once again.

  “I wouldn’t do that to you,” Tristan said, handing over Olivia’s phone.

  Olivia beamed, typing a quick response, and then rushed out of the kitchen. She stopped at the doorway.

  “I have to go get pretty. You can have that sandwich!”

  And then she was gone, and Tristan smiled after her, glad Olivia had taken her advice for once in her life.

  ***

  Beckett spent his bike ride home trying to figure out why Canton Crenshaw had seemed so familiar to him, but, more importantly, what Canton’s relationship was with Tristan. He’d seemed comfortable around her, and at the house, like he belonged there, and it struck Beckett that he had no idea about the life Tristan kept outside of Jamestown Academy. Sure, she claimed she never did anything besides work and get together with her family, but Canton was clearly not a relative, so who was he? How did she know him? Did he have to show up just as Beckett was about to kiss Tristan? He made a mental note to ask Tristan the next time they were alone together.

  Beckett had only been home a couple of hours when Tristan texted him, asking if he wanted to come back over. She explained that Tyler had come to see Olivia and was sticking around for dinner, being grilled by Umbris, so Tristan figured she’d see if Beckett wanted to come back. He did, of course, this time taking his car over.

  Beckett parked in the driveway next to Tyler’s car and walked around the house, the smell of barbecued food intoxicating. He entered the yard to see Tyler sitting in the middle of the younger Wallaces, in a circle of chairs that had been placed around their massive fire pit. Umbris was at the grill, a black apron covering his suit, which Beckett had to stop himself from laughing at, and Sol was walking over to the fire. She spotted him first, smiling as he approached.

  “Beckett, Trinity told us you’d be joining us for dinner.”

  Beckett greeted her and Umbris, then went to join Tristan, Olivia, Evander, and Tyler by the fire. They all said hi to him, and Beckett shot a sly thumbs up at Tyler, who was holding Olivia’s hand. Tristan saw but pretended she hadn’t, looking away across the yard and smiling over her shoulder. Beckett sat beside her and grinned.

  “Hi again.”

  “Hi. I’m glad you came back over.”

  “I wouldn’t have missed barbecued ribs for the world,” Beckett replied, looking longingly in the direction of the grill.

  Tristan laughed.

  “Well, hold on to your hat, because there’s also going to be corn on the cob, crawfish, and coleslaw.”

  “I can’t take it,” Beckett put his hand to his chest, laughing at Tristan’s laughter.

  “There's no stopping them now,” Sol said to Umbris, looking over at Tristan and Beckett. “You know how a traumatic event can bring two people together.”

  Umbris nodded, a deep frown knitting his brow.

  “I warned her to stay away, mostly for her own good, but I suppose she's going to have to find out for herself. Getting involved with him is going to make it that much harder on her when she leaves him to join the community.”

  “If,” Sol gently corrected. Umbris looked at her, and she gave him a knowing look in return, a gentle reminder that Tristan had a choice.

  “If,” Umbris said begrudgingly.

  When the sun had set, the food had been eaten, and the fire had burned down to smoldering ash, Sol and Umbris went inside, Evander following not long after. Olivia walked Tyler to his car after he said goodbye to Tristan and Beckett, which left the latter two alone beside the fire pit.

  “I guess I should get going too,” Beckett said a bit later, looking over at Tristan. His eyes sparkled in what glow was left of the fire. “Do you think you can roll me home?”

  Tristan laughed, standing up. She held out her hand.

  “I can't, but I can at least help you up.”

  Beckett took it, and she pulled him to his feet, both of them laughing. He ended up very close to Tristan, and held onto her hand when she went to let go. Tristan looked up at him in the dying light, and he smoothed her hair away from her face, his fingers weaving into the strands as he looked at her. Then, as though he was afraid they'd be interrupted again, his arm went around her waist and he brought her to him.

  Cupping the back of her head, Beckett finally kissed her, and it was everything Tristan had hoped it would be. Her heart blossomed, opening up to his, every cell in her body rejoicing that she'd come home at last. The spark -- no, the inferno -- that she'd been missing with Celes ignited between her and Beckett, and they pressed together, tongues meeting, holding each other like they'd never let go again.

  Beckett broke the kiss but didn't move away from Tristan, rather he rested his forehead against hers, trying to catch his breath. He framed her face with his hands, gently tilting her head back so he could look at her, wanting to know if the wonder on his face matched the wonder on hers. It did. They had both felt whatever it was that had just happened between them.

  Beckett kissed her again, softly, and Tristan clung to him, her arms around his waist.

  “I wish you could come home with me,” Beckett murmured. “I don't want to leave you. I don't want us to be apart anymore.”

  “I don't either,” Tristan whispered.

  “Walk me to my car?” Beckett asked, and Tristan nodded, knowing she'd walk him to the ends of the earth if he asked.

  The walk was too short, and, when they got to the driver's side of his car, Beckett pulled Tristan to him once again, wr
apping his arms around her. Tristan breathed him in, her face in the crook of his neck just the way they'd been on Wednesday, but it was much sweeter this time, and for a much better reason.

  “When can I see you again?” Beckett asked, his intense eyes searching her face, wanting to memorize every detail.

  “Sunday,” Tristan said breathlessly. “I'm free all day.”

  “I have to work a few hours in the morning, but I'll come here when I'm done,” Beckett promised, and Tristan nodded.

  Beckett kissed her one last time for the night, a kiss that nearly made her toes curl, and Tristan waved as he backed down the driveway, her whole body on fire, her brain hardly able to process all that had just happened, save for one thought: she was in so much trouble now.

  Chapter 20

  Solstice dawned clear and cool. A thunderstorm had rolled in overnight, breaking the humidity just as Tristan had predicted. The whole family got up before sunrise, getting into their SUV and traveling a short distance to a small clearing on the river. They followed Sol in a special yoga routine as the sun rose, giving thanks for all they had received since the summer solstice, letting go of anything that would bring negativity into the new year with them, and celebrating the rebirth of the sun. This was something the family had done for years now, this day as sacred to them as Christmas or Easter was to the non-secular crowd, and Tristan closed her eyes, inhaling and exhaling, feeling a weight lift from her soul.

  The months leading up to the winter solstice had been turbulent, to say the least, but in a matter of days things had started to turn around. It wasn’t just her budding relationship with Beckett -- he was a bonus, maybe the nicest bonus she’d ever been the recipient of -- it was that her attack at the direction of Emmeline Strandquest had changed her. Tristan was sure the intention had been to break her, and through those first numb hours after Beckett had scared the girls away, Tristan had thought maybe Emmeline had succeeded. As she’d emerged from the shock, however, she’d found that what the attack had done instead was liberate her. It had knocked down the last secret wall of insecurity she’d had, the one concerned with how her classmates saw her and privately had her taking their jabs and insults personally. In being humiliated, Tristan had lost it all, but she’d unexpectedly risen from the ashes.

  Evander’s words about her letting the popular crowd have power over her, giving her a hand in how her high school experience had panned out, had finally stopped hurting and started sinking in, as had Tyler’s to Olivia about how the real beginning came once high school was over. Tristan knew she wouldn’t have believed it any sooner than the moment she’d started -- it was nearly impossible to be in such a uniquely isolating environment day after day and not be affected by the idea that everything that happened within the school’s walls, and everything that happened on the branches that shot out from those walls, was the be all, end all -- but as the new year approached, her graduation year, she’d finally seen the light.

  As Tristan moved into the Warrior I yoga pose, she vowed to herself that the path forward would be the only path she walked now. No more turning back in fear, stepping on and off the path, distracted by what ifs -- she’d known since she was a child that the community life was not going to be the life for her, and she was going to start allowing herself to feel secure in that knowledge. She’d focus on maintaining her grade point average, focus on volunteerism, wait for the acceptance or rejection letters from the colleges she’d applied to and come clean to Sol and Umbris when all of those letters had come in. She’d focus on Beckett, on whatever time she had with him now that would be dictated by where in the country their lives took them in the Fall, comforted by Olivia’s revelation that even if things fell apart for them this go round, they’d eventually come back together. Finally, when she had built her confidence up as high as she could, she would let Umbris and Sol know what her decision was going to be upon graduation.

  Tristan knew all of these changes and decisions wouldn’t happen right away. She knew there might come a time or two where she’d waver, where the old retreating method would feel as enticing as a favorite pair of well-worn jeans, but she had to be as strong as her certainty that a common life was the life she was always going to choose.

  When they’d finished their sunrise yoga, the Wallaces headed back to their house, chatting happily about the day ahead. Umbris got to cooking breakfast when they’d arrived, and they all took turns showering and getting dressed, each family member wearing some item of blood red -- the color of the root chakra, the grounding chakra that connected them to the Earth itself. Their clothes stood out especially against the stark white decorations that festooned the house, and Tristan looked around, smiling. There was really nothing quite like the solstice.

  After breakfast, they headed outside to a grand old oak tree that stood in the very back of the yard. Working together, they scattered grains and seeds at the base, hung strings of nuts and berries from the lower hanging branches, and left a wide, shallow basket of fresh vegetables for the deer who frequented their woods. When they were finished, they linked hands, smiling at each other.

  “Happy Solstice,” Umbris said, looking around at them, and they returned his sentiment.

  Sol and Umbris went back inside then, and Tristan, Olivia, and Evander sat at the patio table, a bare wreath made of grapevine resting in the middle. On either end of the table sat bins of materials they’d use to decorate the wreath, which would then hang on their front door until summer solstice, when they'd burn it in a bonfire. They chatted as they worked, about how strange it always was to welcome winter when their temperatures were summer temps to people up North, how they looked forward to the twelve days of Christmas, and, briefly, how special this particular year and its celebrations were. Olivia and Evander both looked sad about this, and Tristan understood their sorrow, wishing there was a way to spare them the inevitable pain of her separation from their community. When all was said and done, the siblings had opted to decorate their wreath with evergreens, for their strength, sprigs of holly, as a nod to the Holly King, bits of oak, as a nod to the Oak King, clusters of faux bayberries, for luck, and leaves of laurel, for prosperity. Olivia tied a pair of perfect, small brass bells to the upper left side of the wreath, a folklore symbol that was used to chase away the unknown waiting in the darkness brought by the winter solstice, and, as a finishing touch, Tristan tied a piece of raw ruby to the lower right hand side with twine, to help manifest their intentions for the coming year.

  Evander went to fetch Umbris and Sol, who came outside and stood beside the table with their children.

  “Another Yule is upon us,” Umbris said, looking around at his family. “Another cycle of rebirth, another chance to refocus on our higher priorities, goals, and missions. With thankful hearts for what the summer solstice brought us, let us look forward to this new cycle with fresh eyes.”

  Sol gingerly lifted the wreath, smiling, and set off around the house, the family following her. She hung the wreath on the front door, then stood back, nodding.

  “Beautiful work, as always.”

  They went inside, each person retreating to their own space in the house. For the next several hours they'd meditate in the silence -- well, Sol and Umbris would. Tristan, Olivia, and Evander would meditate for a while and then try not to fall asleep, at which they usually failed, and then they'd drive to the nearest trail entrance and go for a walk through the woods.

  Tristan was tempted to pull out her phone, to see what Beckett was up to, but she refrained, reminding herself that when the sun finally set and they did their unity candle tradition, their observation of the solstice would end, and then she could reach out to him.

  Instead, Tristan sat cross-legged on her bed, closing her eyes and turning her palms upward. She had never been good at meditation and did not expect this year to be any different, but she'd give it her best shot.

  ***

  The day passed quickly, the siblings arriving home from the woods refreshed and relax
ed. Before they'd started off, Olivia had touched Tristan's back, granting welcomed relief to her still-aching body. Sol had also offered to heal Tristan after the attack, but Tristan had resisted, the pain and the bruising fueling her fire of rebirth; Tristan had only accepted Olivia's offer today so she wouldn't be the reason they'd have to modify their yearly nature walk.

  It had been a long time, too long, since the trio had just hung out with each other and talked about everything other than school; they delighted in each other's company as they walked, stopping along the way to feed small animals like rabbits and chipmunks, identify interesting plants, and turn their faces up at the sun, shining with all its might in the cloudless sky. The trappings of who they'd become as self-conscious teenagers fell away until they were just siblings, just themselves, their bond as strong as it had ever been.

  By the time they got home, the sun was preparing its early descent into the horizon, and the family set up in the yard to follow Sol through one more specialized yoga routine. The winter sky was a peaceful navy blue by the time they'd finished, and Umbris disappeared into the house, coming back out with a small tin box and this year's Yule log. The log had been spray painted white and wrapped with red ribbons and dried holly leaves, per tradition.

  Umbris reached into the tin box, handing Sol and the children a few loose, dried holly sprigs and a single acorn, and then dumped the remaining contents into the fire pit -- charred wood and ash from last year's log -- and added dried kindling. He looked around at his family, smiling as he held the Yule log in his hands.

  “I know this is your favorite part,” Umbris said to his children, who smiled back at him, exchanging looks.

  “For as long as time has existed, so have the Holly King and the Oak King -- one king with dual souls, locked in an eternal battle between dark and light. At winter solstice, the Oak King rings triumphant, promising and slowly bestowing the Earth with bounty, growth, new life, marching forth through the waning cold and the melting frost, only to reverse this bounty in equally slow measure. Alas, when midsummer comes, the summer solstice, the Holly King, having had six months to regain his strength, takes back the battle, overseeing the Oak King's destruction and ultimately allowing for the letting go of the old to make way for the new. There cannot be one without the other; all dark has light, all light has dark. Without death there cannot be rebirth, and the price of rebirth is death. This solstice, we give thanks to the twin kings, and we welcome back the strengthening sun, by which we are energized and guarded.”